Although the word might be new, I’m confident the concept is not. Triangulation occurs when the leader inserts himself or herself into a situation that needs to be worked through by the two or more primary parties involved in the situation.

The leader understands that when s/he does that, s/he robs the parties of a learning experience. Rather than stepping in and taking care of the situation for the parties, how much better to explore with one or more of the parties ways to approach the situation and resolve the matter for himself/herself.

That approach creates other leaders.

Triangulation only creates learned dependency on the part of the followers which is a prison for the leader s/he will eventually regret having created.

Although certainly physically inserting oneself into a conflict might be the first thought that comes to mind, emotional insertion is also an insidious alternative. 

Here a person expands his/her empathy to such an unhealthy extent that they begin to do “the other person’s emotions for them.”  They might get incensed at the way a spouse is being treated by the other party in the marriage or enraged about the injustice being experienced by a friend of theirs.

Categories: Conflict Management

Tags: conflict